Food Review: Disney Princess Spaghettios

The other day, as I opened a can of slop for my daughter, I thought to myself- I should review this crap! What a way to begin a food review. I shouldn’t be calling Spaghettios SLOP! Or crap! This is the stuff childhood is made of. Hotdogs. Puppydogs. Balloons. Princesses.

Nice can, Princess.

Spaghettios are familar to most of you already. Remember this spokespuppet?


Uh-oh, Spaghettios! These are the same exact thing, mostly.  Tiny little pasta shapes, in tomato and… cheese sauce? Doesn’t taste very cheesy to me. It tastes exactly like all other Spaghettio products have for the past 25 years.

Mmmmm- shapes!

They used to be… well, O’s. Now they come in shapes based on TV and movie characters, many of them from Disney. These bizarre Princess shapes made my brain hurt, but my daughter, who cannot yet read, easily and quickly identified all of them.

Now just a doggone… where’s my Princesses!??

What the heck! I pull it out of the microwave, and THIS is what I get??? Needs a stir…

Clockwise from upper left: Cinderelle, Ariel, Crown, Pumpkin Carriage, Sad Frog with Big Nostrils, Zero.

Ah. That’s better. Well, now that they are warmed up, I suppose we should get a professional opinion.

So, in summation:
-They taste good.
-They are cool to girls. Cooler than Spongebob ones.
-They would be better with meatballs.
-The shapes make adult heads throb, but kids have no problem deciphering them. So they work. I am not the target demo.

Fails From the Dad: Tattoo Edition

Image

This is wrong on several levels. The photo captures the moment- what is the tattoo artist thinking? Why is he photographing this monstrosity? Does he think it is good? Was this tattoo applied in someone’s kitchen? Is that a baby seat in the background?

Does Dad, wallet and shoulder both stinging, even know what this LOOKS like?

Dads are not the only offenders. At least the pops above didn’t actually tattoo his child, like this mom from Georgia.

Photo from MyBadParent.com

 

Potty Boot Camp: Third Attempt

Exchange Rates.

Tonight at 5pm begins our third weekend-long attempt at Potty Bootcamp. For the uninitiated, this is were you hunker down at home, take off the diaper and go to the potty on the regular until something actually happens into the toilet. I’ve read a little about it… and we’ve gotten good tips from Dr. Grandma, and friends. I’ll do a little more research today. I’m hoping readers might give me tips.

Here’s the long and short of it. Due to moving, new twin siblings, and so forth, this has been a bit of an arduous process. For months we encountered steadfast and unwavering resistance to the very idea of using the potty. Nothing would convince her, not even “Elmo’s Potty Time. ” (Highly recommended, by the way.)  Her mother and I were at our wit’s end.

Just when it seemed our otherwise intelligent and sensitive daughter would attend college wearing Pampers Cruisers Size 18, and things looked at their darkest, suddenly the light broke through the clouds. We have recently had a handful of #1 successes, but no #2 successes. We are ready to try Boot Camp again.

Not like this, though.

We have 2 potties. One of them, the pink plastic princess crapper, plays an 8-bit royal fanfare when you pee on it. We have rewards at the ready for pooping-a couple of Playmobile mermaids and a couple of Wallace and Gromit DVDs. We have Mike-and-Ikes and Skittles (“fruit M&Ms”) for peeing rewards.  We have a sticker chart. There are 7 stickers on it so far. Two from last night alone! Continue reading

Nutshell Kids Part 1: Pierre

Pierre full-sized library edition (left) and Nutshell Library edition (right).

I just checked Maurice Sendak’s little book Pierre out of the library yesterday, in order to write this book/music/video review of it. This morning I found out that Mr. Sendak died. The obit praises him more effectively than I ever could- it’s worth reading. For example, like his parents, I had no idea he was gay. And he felt he never learned how to draw feet properly. I still regret missing his talk at UConn in 1993. I was probably off listening to Jimi Hendrix somewhere.

Maurice Sendak, 1928-2012

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A Caterpillar in the Craft Corner

Sneak peek!

I did this simple little craft with my mom when I was a kid. I resisted googling it and copying some other schlub’s version, in order to preserve the glorious pure beauty of shared parental-child intergenerational artistic expression (wipes tear). Either that, or it sucks, and I (and you, hopefully) remain blissfully unaware other much better versions of this craft how-to out there on the tubes. But, I ask you- are there more SARCASTIC ones? I think not. That is my new niche- sarcastic craft how-to’s for toddlers. I am certain to make millions.

Anyway, let’s make sure you are prepared ahead of time before you start saying UM KIDDIES LETS MAKE A CRAFT. Unless you WANT to frantically look for pipecleaners while your kid whines about what is the craft and what are you looking for Dad and can we put the eyes on the cat? No- set all that craft stuff up the night before or while they are out in the yard up to shenanigans. Then you can jump right in when it’s time.

The makings of a… Caterpillar!

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